If Batman were real, what do you think he’d be like? Young, handsome, strong… everything Christopher Nolan and Tim Burton have made him out to be, right? Turns out he is real, and he’s a 91-year-old New Zealand war veteran. Batman, a.k.a. John Bray, believes he’s qualified for dealing with the crime in his city after serving in WWII. So, he and his 80-something-year-old sidekick, “Robin,” cruise the streets at night with a spotlight and cell phone as part of the local community patrol. After his trusty sidekick kept falling asleep on duty though, Bray was forced to work the streets alone. Now he’s in search of a new sidekick before the head of the community patrol will let him work the streets again. Joker, you win this round!