ROUND 1: FASHION FIGHT
JAMES BOND: Meet James Bond: a suave spy with the licence to kill. Well-groomed, sophisticated and decked out in black, Bond embodies class and high style. Whether he’s chasing the bad guy or wining and dining, he hardly ever has a hair out of place.
AUSTIN POWERS: Meanwhile, Austin Powers is as flamboyant as his name suggests. He has ugly, yellow teeth, profuse chest hair that looks like a product of Miracle-Gro, and an ego bigger than his mighty mojo. All of this is packaged in a candy wrapper that is Austin’s psychedelic suit.
Austin is still stuck in the ’60s! Bond struts his stuff to snag the first point.
SCORE: JAMES BOND – 1
AUSTIN POWERS – 0
ROUND 2: CATCHPHRASE CLASH
JAMES BOND: You know you’re cool when you need only say your name to impress anyone you meet. But, frankly, I’m not very fond of “Bond. James Bond.” The 007 agent needs a new catchphrase.
AUSTIN POWERS: “Oh, behave!” Austin doesn’t have one classic catchphrase…he has many! From “Groovy, baby!” to “Shagadelic!” he’s bringing sexy back. Watch out Justin Timberlake!
Mr. Powers wins Round 2! “Yeah, baby!”
SCORE: JAMES BOND – 1
AUSTIN POWERS – 1
ROUND 3: INSPECTOR GADGET
JAMES BOND: Let’s face it: James Bond is the go-to guy for espionage gadgets. Q-Branch provides him with the latest devices such as the Golden Gun made up of a lighter and a pen, a watch that can detonate explosives, or a briefcase that will spray gas at anyone who attempts to break into it.
AUSTIN POWERS: Austin relies mainly on guns and gags to aid his missions, rather than actual gadgets. In fact, most of the high tech toys belong to Dr. Evil, including his giant laser beam, Femmebots, and the cloning technology he uses to create Mini-Me.
James Bond gases Austin Powers! Bond bites back to pull ahead…
SCORE: JAMES BOND – 2
AUSTIN POWERS – 1
ROUND 4: CAR CRASH
JAMES BOND: If you are going to risk your life for international security, you may as well do it in style. James Bond has an affinity for the silver Aston Martin and his has adaptive camouflage that can make it invisible!
AUSTIN POWERS: On the other hand, Austin drives a hot Jaguar, affectionately dubbed the Shaguar, and his father’s Mini-Cooper emblazoned with the Union Jack. Plus, his cars can travel through time. Can your car travel through time, Bond? No. Didn’t think so.
Austin speeds up to 007. The score is tied!
SCORE: JAMES BOND – 2
AUSTIN POWERS – 2
ROUND 5: THE LADIES’ MAN
JAMES BOND: Bond has had more than his fair share of rendezvous with women, but at the end of the day, all he cares about is getting the job done at any cost.
AUSTIN POWERS: More important to Austin than catching Dr. Evil is catching the attention of the ladies and there’s something about him that women find absolutely irresistible, with or without his mojo. Of course, it also doesn’t hurt that Danger is his middle name…literally.
Cars, ladies, and catchphrases are the recipe for a spy’s success. Austin takes the final round!
SCORE: JAMES BOND – 2
AUSTIN POWERS – 3
ROUND UP: Sorry, Mr. Bond. Your licence to kill has been officially revoked. The slick Brit is a sly secret agent and master mole, but he’s no match for the International Man of Mystery’s mojo. Austin Powers is one cool cat with a cause and that is to save the world and make us laugh, one decade at a time.
Web Links:
www.jamesbond.com
www.austinpowers.com